Full of excitement!

If, if, if!

I feel like a kid getting ready for a birthday party or something today. I woke up full of excitement for my weigh in tonight. Weird right?

So many ifs tonight.

IF I lose 1.5 pounds I'll be under 190. Wow.

IF I lose 3.5 pounds I'll hit my 180 pounds off. Ya, 3.5 is high for me to aim, but what the hell, a girl can dream right?

I try not to let the other 'what ifs' push into my mind. They do sometimes. I'm a list maker as you all know. I keep a spreadsheet of my weight loss. It's cool to look back and know what you did a certain year....sometimes. Last year (and part of the one before) was a rough one for me.

I had a stomach ailment called gastroparysis. It sucked. I couldn't eat solid food for about a year and a half. If I ate anything solid I'd feel sick to my stomach and remain full and feeling ill for hours and hours and hours. What a chore that was to try to get all my fruits/veg/protein etc in each day. Juices were the only way to get the fruit and veg in. I ate a lot of cheese for the protein. You'd think if you couldn't eat, you'd lose weight. Nope, not so I'm afraid. Fiber was non existent in my diet...just couldn't process it. I had tests to diagnose the problem, unfortunately there wasn't a remedy. I could take a pill...but the side effects of said pill scared the bejeepers out of me! I opted to just deal with the problems that came from not being able to eat solid food. I did no exercise, didn't have the oomph. What weight I was losing was muscle and not fat. It was so upsetting to go somewhere and only be able to take one bite of food. It wasn't fun.

It vanished last May. I mean one day it was there, and honest to God, the next day I woke up and it was gone!!! I still live in fear it will come back. I'm over the initial feeding frenzy now thank God! You have NO idea how it felt to be able to eat food again! OMG I was like...well like a person that hadn't eaten in a year and a half! I was working at the restaurant of course and took full advantage of all it had to offer! I gained. I started cooking food again. Oh, not Weight Watcher food of course. I gained more. We went out to dinner, we went to parties. I gained. I didn't care. It felt so freakin good to eat again, I honestly didn't care. No, I didn't care until the end of the year when I was looking at my spread sheet and for the first time in years I had a total gain for the year. Now some years previously I might have only lost 1-2 pounds for the whole year, but it was a loss and not a gain. Last year was a gain of 26.4 pounds total for the year. Thank goodness I lost some along the way as if I add up all my gains for 2008, they total, and I think a drum roll is in order here, ppprrrrruuummmmmmm, 74.4 pounds! OMG I'd be at my goal if I'd not gained that! How dumb was that?

Anyway, the point of this post is that I'm happy when I lose. ANY loss. As long as it's going down and not up, I know I'll get to my goal eventually. I don't ever want another year where the gains are bigger than the losses.

BUT today I'm excited. I could get my 180 pound star...again. Yes, that's right, I actually hit 180 pounds off last year sometime before the ballooning commenced. I wasn't going to WW at the time, couldn't afford it. I never got my star. So, even though this isn't virgin fat territory yet, I'm just so darn excited. VFT is coming soon and then....look out world...you'll hear the cheer wherever you are!

This is my year I just know it. I just know that nothing is going to stop me from getting lower than I ever have before. I know this year is going to end in a loss and not a gain. I know that because of my exercise regime I'm a stronger person. I know that I've learned so much from what I've done and what I've been through, that I'm a smarter person. I know that I'll have gains along the way, but I know I'll reign them in before they get out of hand.

So either take my hand and come along for the ride or get the hell out of the way. I'm on fire!!!!!!

I'm going to steal my closure from this guy...just for today FD I promise. I just love your blog.

Fat Mama out!

:-)

Corn dogs, beating your meat, pinwheels, & cuteness

What do they all have in common? Why, they're on my blog today of course!

I like real food. Fatty food. Bet that surprises some of you eh? NOT! If I can fiddle with a recipe and get fatty food results without actually consuming said fatty food, I'm a happy camper. I like corn dogs. A lot. So I thought hmmmm I make a ho cake that I love. I apologize to any ho's out there...it's not named after you, honest. I wondered if I could use that recipe and add hot dogs to it and get a corn dog. I didn't have hot dogs so I used fat free polish sausage. It wasn't half bad. Just gotta figure out how to get it on a stick now!

You all know I like to beat my meat. I've blogged about it often. Here is how I do it. I learned this from my awesome sister in law Louisa (the Kraut) in Alabama. Yes, Louisa of 'I gained 9 pounds in 5 days' fame. She makes schnitzel. I mean kick ass, to die for, mouth watering, schnitzel. She saves all her cereal bags and uses them to pound out the chicken. She makes rouladen that will make you cry, and beats her beef in the bags also. What a smart chick! I've saved all my cereal bags since. No muss, no fuss, no salmonella goo on the counter. Love it! I get a piece of meat that looks twice as big as it is, cooks fast, is tender and yummy. What's not to love about beating your meat??? Below you have 3 ounces of raw chicken in the bag ready to be pounded.

Ta da!!! Pounded out and ready to cook. You'll notice the anti salmonella goo stopper spray in the background of this picture. There might not be any visible goo on the counter, but I don't take chances when it comes to raw poultry.

This was something I had for lunch a while ago and it was freaking awesome. It's a whole wheat tortilla (1pt), smeared with 2 wedges of laughing cow light cheese (1.5 points), layered with roasted red peppers (0 points), 2 ounces of deli roast beef (2 points), and cucumber sticks (0 points). It was just fabulous and bursting with flavor. You could easily load it up with more veg....ya right, like that's going to happen at my house. Gag me. I cut it into cute little pinwheels because that's the way I roll.

This is my grandson Mason in my front yard. I just felt like including him cuz, well, it's my blog and I can!!

:-)

It'll make a turd.

Gotta love my husbands family. That was one of their sayings, and unfortunately, it's made it into our vocab as well. When on earth would you say this, you ask? Well, after any magnificent meal of course!

Tonight's dinner was actually awesome. It rated the 'It'll make a turd' comment. Here, let me show you. The dinner, not the turd.

Ya, it wasn't supposed to look like Mickey Mouse...that just happened. What is this mess you ask? It's a lasagna-esque casserole. That serving is on a large dinner plate. It's a HUGE portion. In fact, it weighed in at 1 pound 8-7/8 ounces! Points? 7!! Even the big man was full. I made the garlic toast out of whole wheat sandwich thins and olive oil and they were superb! The other side was prettier...wish I'd turned one of them over for the pic.

I used the TVP that Heather (praying for your hubby to get another job every day) talked about. You couldn't tell it wasn't ground beef. I swear. I can't wait to try it in something Mexican as I'm sure you won't be able to tell in that either. The amount of TVP that equals a pound of ground beef is only 5 points! It was 2 cups of stuff.

I used 3 servings of Ronzoni Smart Pasta rotini. Yum.

I shredded up 2 zucchini's and diced a red pepper and an onion and cooked those until soft. I then added a can of Hunt's garlic and herb spaghetti sauce. Ya, I usually make my own. I didn't today. I cooked all that for half an hour or so and then took the immersion blender (boat motor) to it. I don't like chunks. After the sauce was all smooth and cooked, I added the TVP and the pasta. Made one layer in the bottom of a cake pan and then spread on a whole bag of fat free mozzarella cheese and 2 T Parmesan. This was where the fat free ricotta and egg beater mixture was going to go, but the ricotta was spoiled. Didn't miss it at all. Topped that with the remaining pasta stuff (pan was pretty full), 2 more T of Parmesan, and baked it about half an hour. A whole quarter of the cake pan (yes a 10X13 one) was only 7 points. I had half a serving for 3 points and my garlic bread and salad and I'm satisfied. Papa ate the whole serving and he's satisfied.

TVP's maiden voyage got an A+.

:-)

Shake it up baby now!

Twist and shout!

I did just that this last week. I changed up everything. I added 2 points a day to my points total. I changed up my exercise routine. I even changed up the kind of food I ate. I've had 2 undeserved gains in a row so something had to change. I gained .8 two weeks ago and 3 pounds a week ago.

I have been doing 37 minutes on the elliptical 6 days a week. I've been doing strength training 2-3 times a week. This last week I still did the strength training, but I added a few new moves. I did a bit of circuit training with my cardio. I did 10 minutes on the elliptical then hopped on the bike for 10 followed by the treadmill for 10. Lather, rinse, and repeat. Making it a total of 60 minutes cardio. One day I took it on the road and walked/jogged for my hour. A total revamp of my exercise routine.

I think with my working on my feet and my exercising, I needed a few extra points. I did the point quiz and chose the 'mostly standing, some sitting' box getting me 2 more points to eat a day.

I wasn't sure what to change as I'm pretty sure my gains are hormonal. Do I eat more? Do I eat less? Exercise more? Less? I thought screw it...I'll just change everything.

I did.

It worked.

I lost 7.8 pounds this week.

I was pretty freaking excited. It was funny as I got on the scale and the lady thought she'd done something wrong! She called the other lady over to find out what. I finally said 'there's nothing wrong, I had a great week'. Guess they're used to me gaining. Well, I hope they get used to me losing now! I'm so pumped to get off what I gained on my trip home from FL and get into virgin fat I could just spit! I'm sure you remember I gained 15 pounds on the way home...add the 3 from last week and the .8 from the week before....that's a lot to get off. I think I have 3 pounds left and then it's all gone!

VFT here I come!!!

:-)

Glass of wine

Is helping a lot!

Mikes Hard Cranberry Lemonade, light if you please. Two points a bottle. Love it. I pour it in my crystal wine glass instead of belting it back like a sailor. I get 2.5 glasses that way and I feel like I'm having a lot.

I got 10,019 steps today. I've got the next 4 days off. I can't wait!

I did excellent today at work. I got over so many hurdles. Let's list them shall we? I'm the Queen of lists. Sometimes, I make a list and then do something that isn't on the list, so I write it on the list so I can cross it off. Yep....I like lists.

List of things I did good today:

1. I didn't kill the dishwasher even though she pissed off my last nerve. I kept telling myself that she's probably got something bad going on in her life and it's just coming out in being a bitch to me. That worked for a while. Then I tried telling myself that dish washing is the best she's ever going to do. So I should have patience. That worked for a while. Then she did it. She really pushed the wrong button. I'm afraid I spouted 'Well fuck you then' and walked away. I felt better though and I didn't kill her. So I think I did good all in all.

2. There were 3 cheesecakes that had to be eaten today. Last year this was my dream! Not 1, not 2, but 3! Oh yes, bring them all on. Last week I couldn't resist and I ate it. Today I, laughed in the face of the cheesecake. Take that you 800 calorie, 67 grams of fat, piece of heaven!

3. V, the lady I work with, brought in treats again today. If you recall, that was my undoing last week. This time she brought chocolate mocha brownies. Tried to get me to eat one about 4 times. Thanks, but no thanks. Gosh I wanted one. I didn't have one.

4. I worked 2 pizza buffets today. Lunch and Dinner. I wanted pizza and cheesy bread so bad at lunch. We can, of course, partake. I didn't. I wanted to, but I didn't. Got past that and then it was time for the dinner buffet. More pizza, more cheesey bread. Nope, not even a lick of a greasy finger! I should be sainted.

5. I didn't quite get my 10,000 steps at work. I called home for my ride and asked to be picked up at a business down the street and I walked there. Hit 10,019 steps. Yep....after being on my feet all day long, I did that. Damn I'm good!!!!

So, I think I deserve this 2 point bottle of alcohol.

I might even deserve 2.

I feel goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood!

:-)

Kicking and screaming

That was basically how I got to the gym today. I did NOT want to go. I knew I HAD to go. I got up and had my coffee this morning. The whole time I kept thinking, "I gotta go to the gym". Talk about coffee depression!

We go to Mass at 11am on Sunday. I should have gone to the gym before that, but noooooo I didn't. Got home at 12:30 still thinking "I don't wanna go to the gym".

Finally ran out of excuses. Got myself to the gym. I feel excellent now.

Lesson learned?

Get the hell to the gym early and get it over with on days I have other stuff to do!

:-)

Who ya gonna call?

I took it outside today.

When my boys were young (OK last year), and they started to wrestle around in the living room, I'd say 'take it outside boys'! I didn't care if they kicked the snot out of each other as long as they didn't break my stuff. Today, I took my exercise outside. It's all this guys fault as he did it yesterday.

Yep, I pulled on my big girl panties (to quote that guy, and they really were my big girl panties as it's laundry day and the...well you get the drift), and hit the pavement. I said I was going to shake up my cardio this week and I'm doing that. Yesterday was a cross training cardio session at the gym and today was walking/jogging outside. Yep, that's right. This fat chick jogged a bit. I kept thinking of Ghostbuster's while I was walking for some reason. I got ready to go and the line 'Let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown... ' popped into my mind and off I went!

I would see a set of mailboxes and tell myself I'd jog between them...I'd hit it running. Get half way to the next set and the line 'mother pus bucket' burst from my lips. I shit you not! I made it though!

I was sweating like a pig. I breathed heavy. My heart rate was definitely up.

I came, I saw, I kicked it's ass.

This chick is toast.

Shit, now I gotta go to work!!!!!

:-)