Monday, July 19, 2010

Anal probe

No, not the thing, the personality. Are you anal?

I sure am. To the nth degree.

That has been one of my problems with weight loss in the past. I scoffed at people at the meetings that said they just eyeballed portions. Eyeball??? Nooooooooo noooooooo nooooooo not me! I weighed. I didn't just weigh in ounces, I weighed in grams.

I learned that a 1/2 cup of oatmeal weighs way more than it should. Therefore, if I measured, instead of weighed, I got more oats, therefore more calories, therefor more fat. If I couldn't weigh out my oats, 40g btw, I'd skip the oatmeal for that day. If I couldn't weigh my cereal, I'd skip it. Potato chips? Count 15? What are you? Some kind of sick pervert??

I would make a double batch of something, let's say oatmeal here. So, it's all cooked together in one pan. How do I separate it? Get two bowls and dollop some in each? Oh hell no. Get 2 exactly matching bowls, and yes, weigh them to make sure they are exactly the same. Then, carefully spoon oatmeal into each. Weigh one, then the other. A few grams off? Keep moving oats from one bowl to the other until it's exactly the same. A gram people.....a gram! A freakin gram can be 1 oat! Is there even any such thing as 1 oat??? I'd get them exactly the same and there'd be 1 oat left....couldn't put it in either would toss it. Um, Anal? Who me???

I have broken many a pretzel in half to get the exact gram count.

Eat a chicken thigh and count it as 3 points? Oh no no no....weigh the said chicken thigh with the bone, eat the meat, then weigh what's left. It might be less than 3 ounces you know...then less points!

OMG it's no wonder I'd get so frustrated and cry to my very good friend Ian that I just couldn't take it anymore. I'm sure this is why he's bald. He's pulled his hair out in exasperation from listening to me moan! I'd actually break down in tears....flail my arms and everything. I just can't take any more weighing and measuring. It's too much work. Don't even get me started on planning and tracking!

Earth to freakin Debby...YOU'RE MAKING IT WORK!!! It doesn't have to be. It doesn't have to be exact. Oh, it has to be close, but holy shit get a life! If there is 1 extra oat in today's bowl and 1 less tomorrow....won't it really all even out???

Deep breath here....this is another way I'm trying to change this time around....yes, it will even out. There, I said it!

Today I made oatmeal using a measuring cup. I didn't have a heart attack or anything.

Today I took 4 Jennie-O turkey sweet Italian sausages, split them open and divided each sausage in half and cooked them all up. I didn't weigh them...I just broke them in half the best I could. I didn't even need a paper bag to breathe in!

I measured cherries into individual containers today. I just took the stems off and tossed them into the cup. I didn't try to jiggle the cup, arrange each cherry to get the most in...I went with the flow. I don't think cherries have ever tasted sweeter!

Pixie is stomping on the anal probe this time. I may be old, but man oh man I'm still learning!



  1. I can become pretty anal at the best of times!! This time i'm try to relax more and go with the flow.

  2. :o) HAHA. Funny, laughing about the weighing of the chicken thigh bone devoid of its meat. LOL.

    I am pretty anal too about most things, but for whatever reason, I'm one of 'those' people that eyeballs servings. I am not anal about that at all. And, I NEED to be more anal with that...

  3. I love your posts -- hilarious -- always a good start to my day. Write more!

  4. hehe, u sounding like me in this post ~ the me who was losing the weight...not the me maintaining ~ more relaxed now..hence the small gain.