Mind to disjointed to make a paragraphical blog this mornin. It's all over the place. I slept maybe an hour last night. Oh that's not going to bode well for today! Things going freakin fantastic here. Mostly.
1. I got a job! That's right peeps, no poor house for me and TBM. Thank fuck.
2. I've been kicking ass at the Weight Watcher program. I actually feel a bit less blubbery. Today should be my meeting, but with my new job I won't be able to go mornings anymore so I have to switch to a night time meeting. With Fat Daddy type thinking here's where my mind went. IF I went to my regular meeting today, I wouldn't go again until a week from Monday at night. So, that means over a week. My mind might, heavy on the might, think oh wow, I can eat an extra day or two and it won't count. Free days, you know? So, I'm not going to my meeting this morning, I'm going Monday night instead. That way I'll be forced to be extra good the next few days because I'm switching from a morning weigh in to an evening one.
3. Did I mention there are big bowls of chocolate candy bars in my new office? Fuck me. Still working on what to do about that. No, they must be there. I have to suck it up. I'm thinking of a big bowl of grapes on my desk. Only for me though. I don't want any nasty ass strangers fingers in my grape bowl.
4. This job is something I've never done. I'm going to be selling real estate in our park. I don't need a license as the park is the broker. Lots of paper work. Lots of computer work. Lots of all kinds of shit I don't know how to do. How fucking awesome is that? Old dog learning new tricks. I feel empowered. Seriously. I'm not afraid, I'm excited. I'm ready to learn and amaze.
5. No exercise peeps. None, nada, zip. WTF kind of failure am I at that? Suzi will be kicking my ass soon. Need a plan. Add that to the list.
6. Lots of personal drama in my life at the moment. I hate drama. I hate not sleeping ALL night. Drama kept me awake ALL night. Shit.
7. I have a worrying breast lump. Sorry guys to just put that out there. I went for my yearly in September. I told her about the lump. I had my yearly mamo followed by an ultra sound by some asshole that I'd much rather have cold cocked than let him palpitate my breast. He and the woman before him were cold, rude, and really pains in the asses. Couldn't see the lump on ultra sound. I get that. So, he'd roll over it with the rolly overy thingy and I'd feel it and say, right there. He, instead of saying 'it's not showing up on the scan', kept saying 'there is no lump'. Well excuse the fuck out of me asshole, YES THERE IS! Now, it may be some kind of benign tissue that doesn't show up on ultra sound, I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but when you've got some fuckwad telling you there is no lump at all, and not only can you feel it with your fingers, you can feel it just there. I can feel it just sitting here...from the inside out, ya know, you're not getting the answers you need. So, ladies, we need to stand up for ourselves. If we feel something is hinky, we need to take it further. I've made another appointment with my doc, who I'm not too sure I'm fond of and this will be the deciding factor. Tell me it's a cyst, tell me it's fatty breast tissue, tell me WHAT it is, because it sure the fuck IS.
8. I've got a 7 bedroom home in MI that needs to sell. I've got a park model in the park here that needs to sell. I've got a 35 foot 5th wheel and a 1ton diesel here that need to sell. I can breathe when those 3 things sell.
9. I ate fruit and veg this week. Holy shit that's huge.
10. On the whole, life is good. My mind is in turmoil, but it will pass. Main thing? All that shit going on in my life right now and I stayed on program. Did you hear that? I STAYED ON PROGRAM. ALL WEEK LONG.
Peace be the journey
A wink and a smile
5 years ago