Thursday, August 13, 2009

I've staged a coup!

On fat!

Yep, that's right. Operation Fat Blaster has given me the drive to do what needs to be done.

I lost .6 at my WI last night. Not a lot, but a loss. It's given me the drive to push forward this week and try to lose a bit more.

People say we share too much on the Internet, put too much out there. Well, if we don't share, how can we maybe help someone else going through the same thing? I'm really glad others share, it helps me. It makes me feel I'm not alone. So, that being said...menopause sucks! It wreaks havoc on your weight loss. I can be perfectly 100% OP and gain. I've finally come to accept that. Apparently I'm post menopausal. That's what the blood test showed. That's cool of course as it happened and I never knew it! Here's the scoop ladies. If you're taking birth control pills you're chemically altered. You'll continue having TOM until you get off them. Did I know this? Ah no. Assumed when menopause hit, TOM would stop and then I'd know and quit taking the pill. Freaking doctors tell you nothing I swear! I threw my pills away in June to let nature take it's course. My new doc did a myriad of blood tests (not pregnant so that's cool!) and one of them was for menopause. It shows I'm post...done with...all over. Wow! How freaking cool is that? Of course, once I quit taking the pills, the hot flashes began. They suck too. Anyway, just in case there are other women out there preparing to go through the dreaded prepared for weight instability. Don't let it upset you. Just go with the flow. It can't last forever, right?

Did I do all I could do this last week to lose more than .6? No. I didn't exercise. I ate 100% totally OP, but I didn't move my ass the way I could have or should have. I feel my .6 loss was a reprieve. I showed a gain on my scale even just before I left for the meeting. It was 'only' .2 gain, but it was a gain. I really breathed a sigh of relief when the scale at WW showed a loss. After reaching my HUGE milestone last week, I didn't want to regress. Operation Fat Blaster has me fired up! I'm going to do more this week. If my hormonal state lets me, I hope to show a loss again next week. Onwards and downwards! If I show a gain, I'll know in my heart there was nothing I could have done to prevent it. That's all I can do. I can do my best and nothing more. This week, I shall do my best!

I had a HUGE nsv yesterday. As you know, when I got home from FL in May, my size 18's were tight. Here's a recap. Last spring I was in size 14's. I started working at Buccilli's and started eating...and eating...and eating. I had to move to the size 16's. They got tight. When I left for FL in the fall, my size 16's were so tight I couldn't sit in the truck in them comfortably. Hell, I could barely get them on! I bought a pair of size 18's for the trip. I fully intended to get rid of them the minute I hit FL and get back on the wagon. That didn't happen. I continued to eat and plump. It wasn't until January, after gaining 34.8 pounds since May, that I finally put the skids on. I came home from FL in May this year still in my size 18's! They fit better though. It was a huge pleasure to get back into my size 16's here a month ago or so. I immediately, no, IMMEDIATELY, got rid of the size 18's. I gave them to a lady at my WW meeting. NO way this fat ass is ever getting back into that size again. Nope, never, not going to happen. So, my size 16's felt loose the other night while out shopping. Yesterday, I thought hmmm for a lark, let's just see if we can skinny into the size 14's. You know, see how much farther we need to go to button those babies. They slid on with ease, they zipped, they buttoned, and....THEY FELT AWESOME! Not tight, just right! I wore them to my meeting and it's an hour away. Total comfort in the truck the whole time. I tell ya, I'm flyin on cloud 9 here...hell I might even be on cloud 10!!! I fully intend to be able to give away the size 16's before we leave for FL in 5 weeks. That's another goal of mine.

Damn the goals keep piling up. Giving me something new to shoot for. Giving me motivation and drive. Just what this puffed up Pixie needed!

Bring on the size 12's as I've NEVER EVER EVER EVER been in that size in my whole fat life! Remember, I've been fat since I was 5. I'm easily 100 pounds lighter now than I was in high school. I have NO idea what size I wore in high school, but at 200+ pounds, it sure the hell wasn't a size 12. The day I put those on in the dressing room, you'll hear the shout. Not a doubt in my mind. Oh ya, I freakin can't wait!!!

Get the hell out of my way cuz I'm on a roll!



  1. Keep up the good work, congrats!!

  2. hells to the fucking yeah! hot flash? hot streak, i say!

  3. YES! on getting your butt in those 14's! Whoo hooo! Its SO strange when your wearing clothing that reads a # that you have never worn before. I was folding clothes the other day and I thought some shorts were Seans ( yeah he weighs LESS than me-bastard!) and I folded adn put the shorts in his pile, but they were MINE! WHOOHOO!!! lol

    Good to know about the BCP! I stopped taking them about 6 months ago cuz I thought they were messin with me. I felt very moody and figured 12 years was long enough to me taking them. I actually feel better. :)

    Keep up the GREAT work Pixie, and soon will will have to re-name you to Petite Pixie! :)

  4. You are doing Great! Congrats on getting to the 14's the day will come when the whole world will hear your scream on getting into the 12's. :)

  5. I am going thru the same hormone thing right now myself. How nice you didn't even realize you were done. Hate the hot flashes!

    Huge Congrats on the size 14's. I can't wait till I get here. My goal is a size 12.

    Love your kick ass attitude! Keep your mojo going!

  6. You are amazing, and I'm so glad that you are getting smaller and smaller. That was one of my favorite things about losing weight - buying smaller clothes!

  7. Congrats on the 14s! Now keep it up. :)

  8. Fabulous - both are sneaking that loss in, and the size 14's. And you're right - I love the blogs where people really heartfelt open up and share everything. Sometimes I'm hesitant to do it myself for fear of what people might think, but then I remember that I enjoy it when other people tackle the taboo subjects - either I learn stuff, or I feel less alone - so please keep sharing! x

  9. AWESOME NSV!!!! That's great! I can't wait to follow suit!

  10. Awesome baby. Here's to size 12!!

    I think we are similar in this Deb...I cannot lose if I do not exercise. It just comes to a screaching halt. So as much as I hate walks, treadmills, bikes and...@#$% elipticals, I have to stay on them.

    Great job on the pants. That's a big or bigger feeling than the scale.

  11. I'm now in pre-menopause...and have lost 20kgs since Feb till now, I blamed my weight gain to the fact that I was going into menopause...but have seen I can with great management of diet and cardio keep it off..but agree, from one day to the next I can gain as much as a frustrating.