Sunday, August 23, 2009

A persevering Pixie

"Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did." Newt Gingrich

Whether or not I agree with his political views, those words sure hit home to me when I read them a few minutes ago. OK, so I might have been reading the Readers Digest while sitting on the toilet, but hey, I have many ephiphical moments there. No pun intended!

I'm struggling to beat the band here. My body wants to remain at 190 pounds and I don't want it to. I've read in the past that our body has set points...a point where it is happy and wishes to remain. My body wished to remain at 240 pounds for about 10 years. It then gained 10 pounds without my consent. I lost that 10 pounds, but it was ever so difficult to breach that 240 pound mark. It took weeks of trying until finally, the bod gave up the fight and let the fat go. I then happily lost that 40, and then another 10, and then it said 'whoa bitch! enough is enough!!!' It does not want to go lower. I'm staying OP and either gaining or staying the same. I'm hanging on by my toenails. I need to persevere...keep doing the hard work even though I've done it already. It should be easy by now, but it isn't.

I am having mental battles with myself about 100 times a day. I keep telling myself maybe I just need to eat and gain some and then get on the losing wagon again. Then I tell myself I'm a freaking moron. Do I REALLY want to lose the same 5 pounds again??? Really??? Um no I don't! So I go back and forth. Eat! Don't eat! Eat! Don't eat! Good grief I'm driving myself insane! I've managed to not eat every time...but it's getting harder and harder to fight the beast within. I mean there is NO way I can keep doing it if I let it be this difficult.

Reading old Newty boy's quote today made me realize that I'm not the only one out there that has hard times. I mean if he said this, it's because he, or someone else, did hard work, and had to keep on going with the work being just as hard. Awesome. I'm not alone. I'm not a single fat broad swimming in a sea of self doubt being persecuted by fatty foods! I can do this. I can outstubborn the fat. It may not be this week, it may not be this month, but I can, and I will do it!

Take that fat!

You're toast!

Mmmmmmm toast with butter.....OK, so maybe I've got a LOT of hard work left!!!!



  1. Girl, I wish I had half your perseverance! I know what you mean though. Those voices inside our heads are hard to deal with sometimes! I am a self-sabotager (that's not even a word) but hey, I am!! I am so happy to hear you haven't given in. Being strong with this battle is not easy and you are keep up the struggle! You definitely are not in it alone!

  2. A great phrase - "I can outstubborn the fat". Oh yes you can, as well as inventing great phrases too!

  3. As far as you have know you can outlast the fat. I hate the plateaus soooo much. I increase my exercise regiment every four weeks under the "self invented theory" that it will keep my body from going into plateau mode. They're not huge increases, just enough to keep the exercise from ever getting easy. Maybe that would work for you.

  4. I like that quote a whoooolllllle lot, D. A whole lot. It's so true!

  5. No toast with butter - not allowed! :) I think you bring up a really good point about our body having a point where it is happy. I don't know if it's truly scientific or not, but it certainly seems true.

    To break past those setpoints (or setpounds) I tried changing up my exercise, calorie cycling, and flipping around my nutrient intake. Usually one of those worked to get me moving again.

    And yes, you are right, you do NOT want to gain 5 pounds just so you can lose it!

    Thank you so much for the really wonderful comment on my blog. It made my night!

  6. awesome quote and kick some ass!

  7. i hate it when my body gains without permission! it sucks!


    :) i lost last weeks gain. its good to lose but losing what you already lost once is horrid.

  8. Ohhhh I go through the same struggles Every.Single.Day too!!!
    Everyday I'm battling between desire, which tells me to eat what I like because life is short, and reason, which says I should stay on plan and work on moving the scale in the other direction. It's soo hard!! I feel you!!

    But you have to hang in there! Cuz you are an inspiration to so many of us!! XD
    I know you can do it Debby!

  9. are an inspiration!! My husband and I joined WW online yesterday and we are on our way to a new way of life! I will be checking your blog for more inspiration! My husband and I did WW before and he had lost 102 pounds and I lost 60 but life got in the way and we gained it all back plus more...thanks for the boost I needed:)