Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Throwing in the towel

Isn't an option. If it were, it would have been hovering over the trash bin as I type.

I had a 2.6 pound gain this week. I'm just plain pissed off. I understand things happen. I don't have to like it.

I was 100% OP each and every freaking day. I made sure to get my 2 fruits and my 3 veg in every day. I got my 3 milks and my healthy oils in also. I was picture perfect. I exercised 6 days by doing a 2 mile (instead of the 1 mile) WATP each day. Two, or three days, I can't remember which, I rode my bike 5 miles at a fairly good clip. I was counting my biking as leisurely biking. My friend went with me yesterday and thought it was more moderate than leisure. Works for me! I try to maintain a 10mph speed and I go for 5 miles.

I allowed myself to wallow in self pity until after my WI this morning at the meeting. I know not to focus all my energy on the scale, but face it, we do use it to measure. I got on the scale knowing it was up as I weighed myself here at home. The look on the lady's face was actually the best thing I've ever seen at the scale. It was pure sympathy. No raised eyebrow thinking she knew I'd been bad. I think she wanted to get up and give me a hug actually. I told her I didn't deserve it and she believed me. I didn't get any platitudes. I know it will be better next week. I know it's the week of the month I always gain. I know it could be due to the ramped up exercise I did this week. I know all this. I've been doing it long enough....I KNOW ALREADY! She didn't try to tell me anything I already knew. She just said 'well that's in the past now isn't it?' What a gal. I needed to lose 1 pound this week to get another star, to make my #165 off. Bummer I didn't do it. I wanted to. That's in the past now isn't it?

I'm fighting myself today to keep OP. The only thing keeping me at this moment (and I won't promise it's going to work all day) from eating the wallpaper, is my 30 day commitment to myself. It's not 30 days yet. I promised I'd stay OP for 30 days. I promised I'd exercise for a min of 5 days a week and yada, yada, yada. I haven't broken many, if any, promises in my life. I don't want to start now, but I can't guarantee today's success yet.

I will promise to not go off program in the next 60 minutes.

Baby steps.


  1. Okay, so how did that six minutes go? I am at home because of a snow day (and no snow I might add -- don't ask) and not doing well OP today at ALL! Went to a favorite mexican restaurant and did really well with the points, asked them to go light with the oil, yadda, yadda, yadda, but when I go there, I always get into a munchie mood.

    So, like you, sixty minutes at a time maybe! LOL

  2. It seems that people fail at this because they see a result they don't like on the scale, and give up. Life, and weight, is full of ups and downs. I can weigh myself 3 days in a row, be 175 Day 1, 178 Day 2, and 170 Day 3. I know no rhyme nor reason, so I don't worry about it. Some is salt, other reason?

  3. You are doing great! A little what. Don't be a slave to the number. You are doing so well and you know it! Keep at it. This gain will come off sooner than you know it.

  4. Ditto, ditto! I agree.. it is in the past... leave it there and move ahead! :) I just joined as a follower of your blog. I am on WW too and have just started a blog myself! Go check it out if you like! I will be following yours, very inspirational you are!! :) Thanks!

  5. It might be the bad fairy for not showing more sympathy to poor Silverback. Just a joke.

    Here's my hug. WI suck big sometimes.